Bernadette Benda

This week I fulfilled a life long dream. (Gotten a book published? Found a portal to Middle Earth? No.)

I broke into my very own house. *cue Mission Impossible theme*

My sister and I went to see Jurassic Park at a drive-in this week (DINOSAURS). IT WAS GREAT. We sat in the back of my hatchback with pillows and blankets (though it was gloriously warm out and felt like we were on Isla Nubular or whatever its called) and ate potato chips and frosted animal crackers (NOSTALGIA). We got home at around 2:30 am. Walked up to the front door.

The screen door was locked.

I repeat, the SCREEN door was locked. The actually door was locked as well, but we have a key for that, the screen door has no key (at least not one that anyone knows about. Though there is a keyhole).

My sister starts trying to call mom and dad (who are, you know, asleep). I start planning how we are going to have to break in. We’ll have to break/cut through the screen which is obvious. I’m trying to plan the least destructive entry as possible. Thankfully, I carry a mini pocket knife on my key chain.

Well, no one answres their phones. So, Agent Bernadette gets to work.

I take out my knife, and going close to the handle, slice a nice, small clean line through the screen (it was a very satisfying feeling) I reach my hand in.

“You know we still have to go through the door,” my sister says, implyingthat we will have to rip through the WHOLE screen.

I look up at her, and with my hand reaching inside, unlock the screen door and open it.

My sister: Oh.

(We’ll ignore the part where I had trouble unlocking the actual door)

On a side note, I really need to take my laptop into the shop. The battery won’t always charge, and little while ago I accidentally left it unplugged for a while and now it’s at 4% and who knows when it will start charging again. *nervous grinning emoji face*

AND I think it’s either the internet or my laptop, that when I’m typing on WordPress (offline typing is fine) it takes FOREVER for the text to show up. Like I just type a whole paragraph and then sort of sit back for a while and wait for all the words to appear.

And the SD card reader doesn’t work. (I’m never buying a refurbished computer form Overstock again. It has caused me nothing but problems, THOUGH is is a really nice computer it is just annoying how many problems there has been.)

Oh. Did I mention that the mouse keys don’t always work (THAT’S IT. MAYBE I SHOULD JUST BY A MOUSE)

Now that I’ve bored you with complaining about technology – What else can I bore you with?

Me getting excited about my Snow Queen novel??? THERE’S GONNA BE SNOW. AND EPIC BATTLES. AND YAKS. I don’t know why but for some reason I’ve been determined that yaks will show up in one of my stories. Don’t ask why. (“What did you say?” “The yak’s milk. Milking a yak ain’t exactly a picnic , but once you pull the hairs out it’s very nutritious.”) (What’s that from ladies and gentlemen???)

The one thing I’m looking forward at with a “oh no” face, is traveling (like, my characters traveling. I personally would love to travel right now. All I want to do is run out the door screaming “I’M GOING ON AN ADVENTURE” and “hit the open road!”). Most of the novels I’ve written lately have either been in modern settings (where there are cars and airplanes to take up travel time and make it short) OR, it’s been a small fantasy setting where even though there is travel it’s in a the setting of a smaller country.

This, however, will be set within a FREAKING EMPIRE. so that will be fun.

It hearkens back to the days of The Green Crow (IT WILL BE WRITTEN. or rewritten. I am thinking of turning it into sci fi. Don’t ask) and my troupe of characters traveled like across the world five hundred times and it took FOREVER and like trying to fill up travel time, and then coordinate things to happen at the time as they happened in different places was a lot of fun.

Looks like I’ll be back at it.

I just am really excited about this project. I have grand visions of what I want it to be. Some sprawling 300k sucker or something like that.

Though every time I have a “vision” for what I want a novel to look like… well, sometimes it kinda turns out that way. Sometimes not.

Ok. I would like to say more, but my laptop is moving so slow right now I might LOSE IT. so bye.